(27 Sept 09)
I have come to the
conclusion that well-behaved, decent, good, middle-class Indian’s like me don’t
have a spine. Ashamed to admit, I’m included. And am seething within. We never
strongly protest if someone’s throwing his weight around. If at all we do, not
a soul will support us. If we object to someone dirtying a public place, we
ourselves would be ridiculed. I’ve been guilty of silence myself when I’ve seen
someone do the correct thing, and then regretting that non-support later on.
Why is it that the bad guys are feared? Why is it an unspoken rule that the
rude ones get whatever they want and the soft, gentle ones lump whatever they
get? It’s peculiar to India. I’m not very well traveled abroad, but I haven’t
seen this bad-get-their way attitude in Dubai-Muscat-England-Poland, and
friends/relatives tell me other countries, too, don’t have this strange system.
Let me tell you about two very recent incidents.
On Saturday, Rose Day,
there was a function for little children who suffer from cancer. It’s an annual
thing that I don’t miss. Children perform tuneless songs and graceless dances
which I enjoy very much. In the past, Shabana Azmi, Aamir Khan have mingled
with the little ones, and made it clear to the organizers, I was told, that
they didn’t want the Press, that they’d prefer it to be a private affair with
the patients. They treated the patients like little VIPs. Always a tidy,
well-timed evening, a few well-chosen eats at the end, a cute memento and tons
of memories to carry back. This time, the ‘chief guest’ was Salman Khan. Photographers from The Media had been
hovering around for a while. The children enjoyed their silliness, but were
keen on the arrival of the film-star. The glamour, the attraction, is quite normal,
was to be expected from the junta, specially such very sick ones who have
practically nothing exciting or happy happening in their chemo-controlled
lives. Then, way beyond the scheduled time, the hero arrived. The photographers
grabbed the space, there was jostling and shoving and the fragile kids were in
the background. Some of us made way, or at least tried to, to help the
enthusiastic young ones get near their dream of the evening. Some of the
photographers, to their credit, did kneel and decide to be decent. Suddenly,
one of the adults, who was once a patient herself, lost her temper. She had a
powerful voice, a powerful personality, and she woke many of us from our
what-to-do-now-ness. She insisted that the cameramen leave if they couldn’t
behave. Unexpectedly, two cameramen retaliated. One of them was downright Rude.
When she explained that she was a cancer survivor, he barked, So What! He had
an invitation, and that’s why he was present. A dirty scene followed, ending
short of fisticuffs, a sad end to what should have been a precious evening.
I wonder: does The
Press that prides itself on moral superiority have any code of behaviour? Does
being an invitee mean one can break rules of decency?
Example number two: a
female patient, after surgery was admitted to the ICU. Before the surgery, she
was in a certain bed. In a country like India, where there is a perpetual
shortage of good medical facilities, such beds are scarce and there’s always a
patient waiting for a vacancy. The patient’s daughter, NRI and obviously
wealthy, didn’t give a damn. She practically abused the staff who even
suggested that the bed was needed for another sick person. Ah yes, this habit
of abusing the staff calls for an entire article by itself. Through both these
incidents, I spoke up, but felt helpless that I couldn’t really do much to
change the system. And as I write this, in the tea time of my life, I wonder
what I can do to improve things at least around me. I’m not into the be gentle
and forgive them all philosophy because time and again I find the winners are
the strong, ruthless ones. About readying oneself for heaven and all of that…
will find out after we’re dead what exists and what doesn’t.
Thinking won’t help and
neither will writing. I need to take up dumb-bells, learn the martial arts and
perhaps plunge into politics. And encourage others of my ilk to do the same.
That’s the only thing that will help.
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