Wednesday, 15 January 2014

Love Day, Valentine’s, February 14th



          Hindu right-wingers believe that Valentine’s day has something to do with Christianity. But, the Internet (my guru and guide) says Jesus and His disciples did not observe Valentine’s Day nor anything close to it; Valentine’s Day is not a biblical holiday. India’s left-of-centre folk feel this custom of ‘celebrating’ love is causing a class divide: those who don’t belong to the lip-sticked ‘muah’ crowd become more disconnected socially, politically, and geographically from the hegemonic capitalist power structure.  
         How and when did Valentine’s Day arrive in India?
Around the time my only-Konkani-speaking great-grandfather was a young lad in Palolem, in the United States, the first mass-produced valentines of embossed paper lace were produced and sold (in 1847) by one Esther Howland. She had received a hand-made card from a business associate of her father. Intrigued with the idea of making similar Valentines, Howland began her business by importing paper lace and floral decorations from England. (The English practice of sending Valentine's cards was established enough to feature as a plot device in Elizabeth Gaskell’s ‘Mr Harrison’s Confessions’ (1851): "I burst in with my explanations: '"The valentine I know nothing about." '"It is in your handwriting", said he coldly.)
In my mother’s generation, expressions of affection between boy and girl weren’t promoted/ encouraged.  My parents wouldn’t allow us to glance at cinema posters where the hero was looking at the heroine!
By the time I was in college, in the second half of the 20th century, ‘love’ had returned to the land of Khajuraho and Kamasutra. Adolescents, teenagers and anyone in love began to express what they felt. Through letters and cards, to begin with (I should know, the postman was my best friend through the courtship period). The practice of exchanging cards was extended to all manner of gifts, but mainly red roses (real, plastic, made of stiff cloth or drawn with a sketch pen on paper), chocolates packed in a red satin, heart-shaped box and later, stuffed bears.
Around the time my son was born, in the 1980s, the diamond industry began to promote Valentine's Day as an occasion for giving jewellery.
None of this commerce has impressed our Shiv, Ram and other senas. In past years they have burned stacks of cards, decrying them as vulgar. No one’s ever given me a card/ gift/ anything for Valentine’s. (After marriage, The Man in my life doesn’t take hints or waste money on impractical stuff). So out of curiosity (since the editor of Goa Today had asked me write this article) I browsed through some items at a local ‘gift’ shop. Couldn’t find anything obscene or vulgar in them. But - the words and pictures were so sickeningly sweet that I thought they might be a danger to our prone-to-diabetes population. If for that reason anyone wants to burn them, I’m all for it.  
Though apparently these cards/ gifts might not be burnt henceforth. One New York Times report of a year or two ago said that the thugs who ‘patrolled streets’ in years past might stay at home on Valentine’s Day(s). Apparently, Om Dutt Sharma, Shiv Sena’s Delhi convenor, told NDTV, the Times noted: "What is the use or point? We cannot stop (the young people) from celebrating, and we are getting a bad reputation.” This refers to the fact that in spite of their best efforts to preserve and conserve and promote what’s good for ‘us’, the wayward majority still wants to buy, give and accept trinkets and furry toys. Bah.
Saint Valentine's Day, also known as Valentine's Day or the Feast of Saint Valentine, is observed on February 14 each year. It is celebrated in many countries around the world, although it remains a working day in most of them. It began as a liturgical celebration of Saint Valentine who was imprisoned for performing weddings for soldiers who were forbidden to marry and for ministering to Christians, who were persecuted under the Roman Empire. During his imprisonment, he is said to have healed the daughter of his jailer, Asterius. Legend states that before his execution he wrote her a letter signed "Your Valentine" as a farewell. Today, Saint Valentine's Day is an official feast day in the Anglican Communion and the Lutheran Church: in fact married couples can renew their vows on that Day, though I don’t see why one would need/ want to do so. The Eastern Orthodox Church celebrates Saint Valentine's Day on July 6th and 30th, the former date in honour of the Roman presbyter Saint Valentine, and the latter date in honour of Hieromartyr Valentine, the Bishop of Interamna (modern Terni). In Brazil, the Dia de Sao Valentim is recognized on June 12.
Valentine’s Day was first associated with romantic love in the circle of Chaucer in the High Middle Ages, when the tradition of courtly love flourished. In 18th-century England, it evolved into an occasion in which lovers expressed their love for each other by presenting flowers, offering confectionery, and sending greeting cards (known as "valentines"). There are many stories, many versions, in different parts of the world.
Valentine's Day symbols that are used today include the heart-shaped outlines, doves, and the figure of the winged Cupid. In the UK, just under half of the population spend money on their Valentines and around 1.3 billion pounds are spent yearly on cards, flowers, chocolates and other gifts, with an estimated 25 million cards being sent. A pound is roughly seventy rupees so you know how much the Day is worth. The U.S. Greeting Card Association estimates that approximately 190 million valentines are sent each year in the US. Half of those valentines are given to family members other than husband or wife, usually to children. When you include the valentine-exchange cards made in school activities the figure goes up to 1 billion, and teachers become the people receiving the most valentines. The rise of Internet popularity at the turn of the millennium is creating new traditions. Millions of people use, every year, digital means of creating and sending Valentine's Day greeting messages such as e-cards, love coupons or printable greeting cards. An estimated 15 million e-valentines were sent in 2010.
There are no statistics for India; we have special TV and radio programs, and love letter competitions. One right wing Hindu website (which has a grammatically challenged content provider) said: "Those who celebrate ‘Valentine’s Day’ in the present manner, do in fact insult the saint himself; for they try to start a love-affair before their actual marriage by sending Valentine cards to one another. Had St. Valentine supported this system, he would not have solemnized the marriages in the first place." "Public admission of love" is supposed to be "alien to Indian culture". Although these protests are organized by political elites, the protesters themselves are middle-class Hindu men who fear that the globalization will destroy the traditions in their society.
Despite these obstacles, Valentine's Day is becoming increasingly popular in India. It is usually marked by a steep increase in the price of flowers, particularly red roses, in cities and towns.
 In February ’12, Subhash Chouhan of the Bajrang Dal said "Couples cannot kiss or hug in public places. Our activists will beat them up". He added, "We are not against love, but we criticize vulgar exhibition of love at public places.”  No one has clarified whether exchange of cards/ stuffed toys comes under vulgar display.
I read further on the Net: ‘Does real love require this superficial display and can it be confined to just one day?’ If I were an adolescent in love, superficial or not, I’d want that display and that love every day.
Apparently, 'Valentine's Day' is responsible for the propagation of western culture and incitement of youth towards unrestrained behaviour. I agree that unrestrained behaviour in any form is bad. People who destroy public or private property display unrestrained behaviour.
One more from the Net: “… this madness is taking root in our beloved Hindustan which has the richest and most sublime culture in the world.” Whither modesty?
And another: ‘Love is present in sacred relationships such as the Guru and the disciple, brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers and even towards ones motherland.’ Yes. Give ‘em all cards and gifts, I say, it’s good for business.
Another: ‘If young revolutionaries, such as Bhagat Singh, Rajguru, Sukhdev, Madan Lal Dhingra and Chapekar who sacrificed their lives in their youth, had spent their days celebrating days such as Valentine's days then we would never be able to enjoy freedom today.’ True. Which is why I believe that everyone who reveres the national heroes thus must send their children or volunteer themselves to do military duty on Siachen for a couple of years. That will help India more than burning greeting cards. One year, a few slogan-shouting men, believed to be members of a political party, walked into a busy fast food restaurant in New Delhi's central Connaught Place, where they smashed potted plants, tossed a few chairs and knocked over people's trays. I have no idea how that benefited either the nation or its dwellers.
          I read further on the Net: “The battle is always waged in the name of protecting something called Indian values from something called Western decadence.  Nobody can fully explain what Indian values really are, but there is clear evidence to suggest that they have something to do with Indian girls being sober and married while having sex.” 
         Whatever. Valentine’s Day has become a permanent feature on our ever-increasing list of festivals.  Newspapers carry Valentine’s Day messages, advertisements for satin hearts and cards, and interviews with celebrities about their thoughts on love. Restaurants offer discounts to couples young, old and in my age bracket, too.
         Now, let me find those scissors, ribbons, cardboard bits and a pen so I can make a card to give… nope, not telling to whom.



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